Saturday, September 19, 2009

Urban Peachy

Today we had a fun outing to the Farmer's Market downtown. Our friend Jesse goes most every weekend, so we accompanied her this time. We had a great time and bought really yummy peaches, some homemade bread, and some little grape yellow tomatoes.

But there was one thing Sophie didn't want to wait to eat. As we were strolling away from the peach farm table, I noticed Sophie had a peach half eaten in her hand. She had swiped a peach off the table! I remembered the time I accidentally wore a hat that I was trying on all the way out of Loehmann's and into the mall. and maybe all the way home (Mom, I can't remember!) My mom made me go back and apologize and hand back my stolen item. So I strolled on back to the Peach Man and told him her indiscretion. This time she was lucky because he was glad for her to have it. She finished the peach up as we got in the car apparently, because I asked her where her peach was and she said, "It's on the floor." Apparently she loved this not-yet-ripe peach, because this is all I picked up off the floor:

We had a great time in downtown and then on our way home happened upon the Cooper Young Festival... so we parked and looked around there for awhile. It was fun too! Tons of people, food, arts and crafts. I found these frames that I loved but did not purchase. You will like them too. I hope to buy some of their stuff at some point.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

My thoughts today

Ever just get sick of yourself?

I have felt so convicted by reading the blog I mentioned yesterday, so much so that I felt I needed to journal (something I rarely do). I pulled out my journal and started reading a little bit of what I wrote last (in January) I was at a conference and had just heard a talk by Tony Campolo.

Here's what it said:

"Yesterday's messages are lingering in my head. Am thinking about how far, to what point am I willing to go to be Christ's ambassador? to bring peace in my piece of the world? to give my Self up for the cause of Christ?

It's like, if I think about it too long, You might give me a mission for something big You need me to do. I might have to dream or imagine what there is already for me to do right here in Memphis, in my neighborhood. Or somewhere else where I feel I am far less comfortable.

God, what are you asking me to do right now? There are things I know I am called to now and they are definitely enough to keep me busy, but am I shutting my ears to more? Help me to hear you if so."

The reason this entry makes me sick is that it reminds me of the cycle I am constantly caught in. I feel conviction, I feel fear, I am numb, I ignore and go back to normal life and decide that was just an extreme emotional me who is not in the real world.... then something happens, and I feel conviction... and the cycle repeats. Rarely do I act. Rarely do I search. Rarely do I take a risk. That can't be the Kingdom life I am called to, the upside-down life Jesus refers to in his Sermon on the Mount. I want to be a vessel that is used, and used up... theoretically. But when the rubber meets the road, I come up far, far from that. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself, but then I remember, to whom much is given, much is expected.

I am not sure why I feel drawn to share this on my public webspace. Perhaps it is because I need you people who know me and love me to remind of this, to remind me that I am called to more. That I have to open to eyes to whatever God may have in store for me and my family.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Doing something that matters

I came across this blog and I can't stop reading it.

This matters.